The Dos and Don'ts of "Baby Talk": An Intro to Parentese

Try this - out loud, say “hello” the way you would if you were just seeing your baby for the first time in the morning. You probably said it slow, with an exaggerated intonation, a higher pitch, and maybe the vowels, especially the “o” at the end, was lengthened. Now say “hello” they way you would to a colleague or friend you were meeting for coffee. Pretty different right? You just demonstrated parentese.

What is Parentese?

Parentese is that special way we talk when we interact with babies. It involves several aspects of speech. For one, we speak slower. This helps your baby to focus on all of the different consonant and vowel sounds you’re using and eventually learn to use those sounds themselves. When speaking slower, we also tend to elongate our vowels. By making them longer, we are basically making them easier to process and learn. Since vowels are the first sounds babies learn to produce, this is a really helpful element of parentese. When we elongate our vowels, they are very clear and easy for your baby to listen to and learn from. For example, if I said the word “head” versus “hit”, these two words include two different vowel sounds. If I produce them slowly, and elongate the vowels, it will make it easier to hear the difference between these two sounds, and for babies, make it easier for them to learn to produce these sounds themselves. 

Patterns of prosody and intonation are also important aspects of parentese. Simply put, this refers to the stress we put on specific parts of words and the way our voices go up and down in a melodic way. Here’s an example: if you were to say “I’m sorry!” it would mean something very different from “I’m sorry?”, right? Same words, but saying them in different ways can actually change the meaning. That’s what I mean by intonation. In parentese, you are exaggerating these patterns. Your voice goes up and down pretty drastically within your words and phrases. Most of us do this automatically when we see a baby! In fact, parentese is something universal. Parents using all different languages use similar patterns when interacting with babies. Using an exaggerated prosody actually helps babies learn where one word ends and another begins. It also helps them to process speech sounds and learn how to produce speech themselves. Plus, producing speech in this way exaggerates the natural rhythm of our language, which, in turn, helps your baby to learn it. 

We also use an overall higher pitch. This really helps to get your babies attention. It will probably also get your baby smiling and focused on your face and your words. All good things! Using a higher pitch is something that we do naturally when interacting with babies (most people do this when talking to animals, too!). Getting your baby to focus on your face is a great thing - this is how they will learn to associate specific sounds with certain lip movements, which is how babies first start learning speech sounds. 

So the three common features of parentese are:

• Slower rate of speech

• Exaggerated intonation

• Higher pitch

What do these accomplish?

• Slower rate of speech: by speaking slower, specifically elongating your vowels within words, helps your baby to listen to and learn these sounds. 

• Exaggerated intonation: by making your pitch rise and fall in an exaggerated way, you are helping your baby to learn the natural rhythm of language and learn where one word ends and another begins.

• Higher pitch: using a higher pitch helps your baby to focus on you and maintain attention to what you are saying. 

Not “Baby Talk”

When we think of traditional “baby talk”, we think of phrases like, “what a cute wittle baby!”, and, “dada gonna get your feetsies!”. As a speech-language pathologist, phrases like this make me cringe. Why would we want to model poor grammar and incorrect speech production for babies? Parentese is not “baby talk”. There is no need to simplify your speech in a way that makes your grammar incorrect, or substitute incorrect sounds for correct ones. You wouldn’t want your child speaking like that when they start talking, right?

When using parentese, you can simplify your sentences and phrases by making them shorter or using less complex words, but you maintain correct grammar and use real words. This is key. If you use real words, your baby will start to learn real words. 

Doesn’t It Sound Silly?

I guess some people might say it sounds silly, but who really cares? It’s fun to sound silly! And think about all of the silly cartoons that kids love - lots of silly voices there! Remember, this isn’t “baby talk”. You are using REAL words and correct grammar. Using parentese helps to gain and maintain your baby’s attention. And it’s just more FUN. Parentese will help to get your baby focused on your face so that they can watch how you say sounds and words and learn how to produce them. 

The point of speaking this way is to help your baby to learn patterns of speech and language. To enhance their development using some really simple strategies. You are helping them to learn how to use sounds and words - what’s better than that? Parentese has actually been studied pretty extensively, and researchers consistently find that this style of speaking leads to more advanced language skills down the road. 

Tips for Using Parentese

To Summarize - here are some dos and don’ts to keep in mind as you are using this effective strategy with your baby:

DON’T simplify words. No need to use the word “wittle”, ever. Use real words when talking to your baby. By doing this, you are modeling clear speech and language for your baby to learn from. 

DO use grammatical sentences. It’s ok to simplify your language, but keep it grammatical. For example, instead of saying, “Baby want milk?”, you could say, “Oh! You want milk!” - notice that the phrase didn’t become any more complex, and the grammar is intact. 

DO read your baby’s signs. If they get excited or wide eyed at a certain word or phrase, go with it! Repeat and elaborate. Maybe your baby loves a certain part of a song or a phrase in a book. Repeat it! You are helping your baby to focus and maintain attention to you.

DO allow time for reciprocal interactions. Allow your baby a chance to respond to you when you are speaking to them using parentese. Babies learn language best through reciprocal social interactions, so allow your baby to take a turn. Even if they don’t vocalize in response, smiling and eye gaze can count as a “turn” in conversation. 

DO talk about what you’re doing. Use mealtime, bathtime, diaper changes, etc. as an opportunity to provide language using parenteese. Talk about what you are seeing when you are out for a walk or at the grocery store. 

DON’T feel pressured to do this perfectly! No guilt trips allowed. You have enough things to think about as a new parent, so don’t make this something else that you need to worry about. Chances are, you are using most of these techniques already. The fact that you are even thinking about these strategies already means you’re doing a great job!

Stay tuned for our newest course covering gross motor, fine motor, speech, language and play development from birth through 12 months of age, which will include more tips on how to use parentese as well as lots of other strategies to encourage speech and language development in babies! This course will provide new parents with a holistic approach to their child’s development including mindfulness strategies to promote emotional well-being for all family members.

For further reading, here are some references for the studies I’ve mentioned above:

Ferjan Ramírez, N., Lytle, S. R., Fish, M., & Kuhl, P. K. (2019). Parent coaching at 6 and 10 months improves language outcomes at 14 months: A randomized controlled trial. Developmental science, 22(3), e12762.

Ferjan Ramirez, N., & Kuhl, P. K. (2019). The emergence of conversational turns as a function of parent coaching on language. The Journal of the Acoustical Society of America, 146(4), 2924-2924.

Fernald, A., & Kuhl, P. (1987). Acoustic determinants of infant preference for motherese speech. Infant behavior and development, 10(3), 279-293.

Liu, H. M., Kuhl, P. K., & Tsao, F. M. (2003). An association between mothers’ speech clarity and infants’ speech discrimination skills. Developmental science, 6(3), F1-F10.

Ramírez, N. F., Lytle, S. R., & Kuhl, P. K. (2020). Parent coaching increases conversational turns and advances infant language development. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 117(7), 3484-3491.

Ramírez-Esparza, N., García-Sierra, A., & Kuhl, P. K. (2017). Look who’s talking NOW! Parentese speech, social context, and language development across time. Frontiers in psychology, 8, 1008.

Thiessen, E. D., Hill, E. A., & Saffran, J. R. (2005). Infant-directed speech facilitates word segmentation. Infancy, 7(1), 53-71.
Trainor, L. J., & Desjardins, R. N. (2002). Pitch characteristics of infant-directed speech affect infants’ ability to discriminate vowels. Psychonomic Bulletin & Review, 9(2), 335-340.